Wednesday, August 12, 2009

I Smell Funny

I was running late to the pediatrician when I noticed that I had cabbage sticking out of my tank top. My cuppeth runneth over.

I also smell funny.

Before I left, I put on a little perfume and used some smelly Aveda hair stuff so maybe the doctor wouldn't smell the cabbage rotting in my bra as she entered the small examination room.

If you have tried to stop breastfeeding, you know what I am talking about.

If you haven't, you probably think I am a weirdo.

Somehow, women through the ages have figured out that if you put cabbage leaves near your breasts that you will not feel pain as you wean yourself/child away from breastfeeding. (Go ahead and google this. I checked today to understand the science behind it. Pretty cool.) You can't just quit. It will kill you. It is best to do it slowly.

Or have your husband pick up cabbage. That's what I am doing. I am having trouble managing the baby, the house, kids activities and pumping. So, in a breakdown yesterday, I decided that I was done. I just can't do it anymore.

So, as I picked up Elle to run into her check-up, I noticed that I had cabbage falling out of my bra. I also didn't want to smell like rotting cabbage so I quickly picked it all out and threw it into my van (to be reused on the way home). I wondered if the Cleveland Clinic had cameras in the parking lot and if some guard was laughing at me. But, I didn't care. The GIRLS were hurting and cabbage is my best friend right now.

See the stuff you learn here at this blog? Yesterday, prostitutes. Today, cabbage for sore GIRLS. What will we learn about tomorrow? You never know.

12 comments:

cristine.boyd said...

I suggest the tightest bra known to man (or woman in this case!). That and some Tylenol is the only way I got through it!

Jessica said...

Seems like I have heard this before, but I won't lie. At first, I was making the most awkward face thinking 'Cabbage...out of her SHIRT?!'

Krystyn said...

I've heard it works, too. I never had to do it because it was a gradual process. I hope your girls start to feel better.

Jessica said...

Oh you poor thing. That process is tough!

Managed Chaos said...

I can't believe that I actually had forgotten I had done the exact same thing until I read your post. Believe it or not, it actually did work...that combined with tight sports bras. Hope your girls are feeling better soon.

amyjr said...

I remember a friend did this to ease her sore boobs when she had problems while nursing. I just remember gradual reduction of breastfeeding but I know where you are coming from.House, 2 energentic kids(boys) and the expectation that we put ourselves at. OY!!!!
If you need someone to run out for more cabbage give me a ring or better yet I will make dinner one night for you guys.

Miss E said...

Ouch! I will file this random bit of knowledge away for the future me to use. I never knew cabbage was supposed to do the trick!

Flea said...

I've never heard that, but it's very cool.I wish I had an excuse to wear cabbage in my bra. The girls are big enough, I guess, that I could pretend ...

Naomi said...

oh this was a good one ... cabbage, motrin and loads of HOT showers .... I remember those moments well.

I happen to LOVE the smell of cabbage ... good thing I wasn't waiting in that doctor's office with you!

Zip n Tizzy said...

I'm in pain just reading this. The first time I weaned I had milk knots as high up as my neck. My husband was begging me to please nurse the baby... it hurt him just to look at me. Cabbage was my friend. I hope you're feeling better now.

MommyWizdom said...

With my daughter, I'd read about this but was "above" sharing cabbage with my GIRLS. When my son was ready to be weaned, I decided cabbage and I should make friends... and it was wonderful!

When you get the cabbage, you want to mash the veins and then apply it. That helped a lot too. Good luck with it all.. it does get better as they get older, I promise!

MommyWizdom

AreWeThereYet? said...

HA HA HA HO HO HO OH OH OH
Thanks for the laugh. Hope you are feeling better soon!

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