Tuesday, June 3, 2008

We've All Been There

Warning! Extremely honest post. Do not read if are easily offended and sell something from home!

My mom sold Mary Kay Cosmetics my whole life. My dad, yes my dad, sold Pampered Chef. Both did really well. The women LOVED my dad. A good looking man that cooks can sell women anything. My mom won a car from Mary Kay. She loves the products and still sells it when she is well. She has sold Mary Kay Cosmetics for over 25 years. I have been around home based businesses my whole life.

So many of my friends and relatives are selling through home based businesses. I could probably shop only from my friends and be able to handle of the gifts I need to buy throughout the year. I love to shop. I love to spend money. But, there is a budget and my husband and I keep track of where our money goes.

Here's the hard part. I don't like hosting the shows. I don't really like attending them. I feel pressured and usually spend too much money. Most of the times, the companies charge shipping and handling. The products are items that I would find cheaper somewhere else. Most of the time, I could do without or I make myself do without.

Sometimes I have had to be the host when a relative really needs to start their business. I find it extremely uncomfortable. I hate to ask my friends to come. I am nervous before and throughout the show. I don't want anyone to feel they have to buy. I especially don't want people to feel that they have to come. I usually serve wine. That helps!

So, as the title of this blog says, "I'm not talking about it, I am just saying..." I am just talking about it. I know it is all me. I am a big girl, I can choose to skip the parties. I can choose not to host the few that I have. I can say no. I have. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I can't.

So, tell me. Do you host? Do you attend? Do you say no? Do you love them? Are you a consultant? Please be kind in your responses. I have had a tough week. Seriously. I beg you.

13 comments:

Krystyn said...

Hmm...they are fun every once and a while, but once you do one and 8 of your friends do the same one and invite you, it gets to be much. And, I agree about the shipping and handling. I don't want to pay for that, either!

So, I'm sort of on middle ground. But, if it's something I don't want to buy, I try to find a way out of going to the party. Especially if I think the stuff is too expensive.

Stella said...

I've been invited to a few of these parties and I'd like to attend but the pressure is what gets me. I feel bad going and not buying, especially when it's a friend. Part of me would love to sell stuff like this because there is a market and you can do well but I don't want my friends or family to feel pressured. It's a very fine line...

Jessica said...

I HATE hosting. I too am SO SO SO uncomfortable. I think what it comes down to is the "expectation" you place on your guests. You can say "no pressure to buy" but who really believes that? You can go to the mall or outlets with girlfriends and come home empty handed. Everyone would just say "no luck." But, at a party you feel like the cheap one. I cannot tell you how full my gift closet is of the "cheapest" thing in the catalog...bread mix, candles, jewlery, buffing cream. It is kinda like the fundraisers for your niece/nephew's school. Can you really not buy something? Or the doe-eyed neighbor kid at my doorstep asking if I want to by wrapping paper..... ARGH! Here is the issue, I would be devastated if I wasn't invited though!

Stephanie said...

I go to church with a very close knit group of close to 300. So when one has a party, guess what? 150 usually follow (not really, but it seems that way!). I don't discriminate, I just don't go. Never hosted a party outside of inviting just family and probably never will. I'm like you I feel obligated to buy, and don't want anyone else to feel obligated. Soooo...I stay away from them!

Poltzie said...

I honestly love to go to these and I love to host them. It's fun and while I usually buy something I don't need I never break my budget. Don't feel guilty, if your friends didn't want to go they wouldn't!

Tranny Head said...

So . . . I don't host them. I do sometimes attend them, but I DO always feel obligated to buy something if I attend. But when I go, I go assuming that I'll have to buy something. So I've already made the decision to spend some money before I agree to go.

The one that is the most fun I think is the Passion Party. It's silly and absurd, but I've gone to a few bachelorette parties that they did as Passion Parties. It's a good way to have a naughty bachelorette party without going out and doing anything too trashy. Oh - and they sell nice bath products.

OHmommy said...

I can't stand hosting or attending. I, like you, feel obligated to buy something that I do not need.

I would rather save my $ and buy lots of shoes.

Ah ha... perhaps I should start a home business selling shoes and having shoe parties. What do you think?

Would you come? ;)

Momo Fali said...

I usually love the stuff people sell at these parties, but I do always end up buying stuff I just don't need. And, in this economy...I can't let that happen.

Genny said...

I've had a couple friends be really successful with home based businesses, so even though I know it can be discouraging, success does happen. I admire the tenacity that it takes!

ConverseMomma said...

I hate those parties too. I usually just go for the odeurves(however you spell that word) and the conversation. Is that wrong?

Half-Past Kissin' Time said...

I love Mary Kay and PC products. In fact, I have almost everything PC has to offer, it seems. That makes it easy to say, "No, sorry. I already have everything they sell!" I hear you on the being asked to have a party thing. I only say yes if I haven't had one in a couple of years and need an excuse for a getogether. Sometimes, I'll offer to have a book party instead. No pressure there...

Anonymous said...

Ok, so I have done, and presently have, a home-based business. I love going to parties for the pure purpose of socializing, but only go if I know I will buy. (I also like to support my friends, especially if they've supported me in the past.) I usually check out the website ahead of time to see what catches my eye and to check out the prices. If it's too pricey or I see nothing, I just reply no. When I host parties or am a consultant for one, I so do NOT take it personally if someone doesn't come. I get more irritated if they come and don't buy. My theory is that it's better to give someone the option of attending and saying "no" then after the fact, have them saying that they wish you would have invited them. I am NOT a pressure-type of consultant whatsoever. (Maybe that's why I don't make the big bucks, although when I do have parties, I make some good cashola.) So many people get stressed about hosting a party. I say there's no reason to be stressed. People wouldn't come if they didn't want to buy or support you. It's as simple as that. At your next party, sit back and socialize with your friends and think about the "benefits/products" you'll be receiving at the end of the night. ;o)

Rhea said...

I sold Discovery Toys for like six months or so, and realized I'm just not a salesperson. I had lots of friends and family buying, but I'm not to type to be pushy and I couldn't continue.

I don't go to many parties because we just moved up here and I haven't met a lot of people in the area yet.

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