Wednesday, February 25, 2009


When I worked, I drove my boss crazy. Not just a little crazy. Really crazy. She couldn't get me riled up. Nothing shook me up. Nothing. She loved when things got hectic and stressful. She wanted to talk about it. She loved to have a strategy. She wanted me to get stressed with her. I was pretty calm. And this drove her crazy.

A few years ago, I wrote to Oprah about my BIL and SIL. We had a producer come to my house and we were on the show. Anyway, when the producer and I talked, she couldn't believe I was so calm. She said "We are talking Oprah. The Oprah Winfrey Show. Most people get a little nervous and are a wreck. You are so calm." Yep. (What she didn't know is that I did lose 5 real pounds that week to being excited and probably more nervous than I showed.)

Today, I am grateful for my nerves of steel. Instead of the 10 day wait for the amnio, I only have wait a whole day thanks to a new faster test. Sometime tomorrow, I should get the call. I have read a lot online and everyone talks about how waiting was the worst part.

Because I know my choice and the test is finished, I am feeling a weird sort of calm. Peace. I try not to go down scary paths of thinking and I am not "thinking positive" as everyone would probably suggest. I just know that what will be will be. And I am OK with that. The answer is already here in my body. I am just waiting to be told. So, I will wait. I will be at peace. And soon, I will know. And as soon as I know, I will let you know if my trip includes Holland or Italy. Peace.


Miss E said...

Your strength and your calm are such an inspiration. I'll be thinking of you and your family.

Kat said...

I read this post and your prior and find you are so wise. I am so glad you are finding peace in all of this. It just means that it will all work out.
Peace. :)

Kelbabe said...

You're amazing, Indy! You're in my prayers tonight. I won't call you tomorrow but I'll be anxiously awaiting your news. So glad it's no longer a 10 day wait.

Jessica said...

That makes me happy to hear this.

And, I often have to remind myself of things like that: the result is already determined, it's just a matter of me knowing it.

MIT Mommy said...

Wonderful - and peaceful. You are a fabulous mom and person.

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